Hope you’re all managing to track down some
sun during this um ‘Great British Summer?!’
It’s been an eventful year full of change
and challenges in the Taylor-Beales camp. Both Bill and I have experienced
several months of limited mobility since May, me due to injury after falling
from stage during a sound check while on tour in Italy and Bill from major reconstructive surgery in his right
hand.
All this during second and third trimester
pregnancy for me! We are thrilled at the prospect of the somewhat imminent
arrival of Baby Taylor-Beales and are hopeful (with the help of our medical
teams) that both Bill and I will also be much more physically able post birth
in these coming weeks and months!
Anyway in light of all this and the various
projects that I’ve had to postpone and rearrange this year I’ve decided to
release an 8 track 'Live Album' of songs that I performed at a gig in Newport
University earlier this year. The
songs feature members of my ‘extraordinary collective’ Catrin Angharad (aka
Angharad Evans), Rosy Robinson and Dylan Fowler.
I’m actually really pleased to have
captured these moments live as the arrangements of the songs including
additional welsh lyrics and harmonies are very much reflective of my live
performances in the last 12 months.
I plan to take official maternity leave from now until May, but will
be back with a brand new studio album to release in 2013 as well as my Counting The Waves collaborative project!
In the meantime please do download this
offering from Bandcamp, and yes it is free! (Well almost- I’m
collecting your emails in return to create a new database after my previous one
crashed and burned with my old computer!) So please do go forth and download it
and pass on and spread de word etc…
I’ll be checking into my twitter and
face-book pages and emails (and no
doubt posting a picture or two of baby T-B) sporadically so do feel free to
drop a line if you are ever inclined these next months…
Huge thanks to you all for your ongoing
support of my music,
As most of you will know I am currently 25 weeks pregnant with my
first child. Last weekend I was on tour with gig dates in Italy and
unfortunately on the Sunday eve I had a nasty fall from stage. The stage was
1.5 meters and the floor surface I fell onto was tiled with no give. I'd just
climbed the stairs onto it ready for my sound check and a combination of my big
baby bump and not seeing my feet and the lights in my eyes not seeing anything
beyond just totally misjudged my footing and stepped out over the edge. I
managed to twist as I fell and landed on my hip and back but fortunately not
the baby bump, pins and needles through my legs instantly I knew it was a bad
fall, and the terror that something had happened to the baby was immense. As I
looked up at the various faces that surrounded me as they discussed calling for
the ambulance, the first words that I spoke were in Italian and simply Bambino-
amazing the way the survival instincts kick in and the brain choosing Italian
rather than English in the desire to communicate the most important thing at
that moment- the welfare of the baby… During the wait for the ambulance
sensation came back into my legs and I found that though I could barely walk I
could at least move them…
Rushed to hospital the Italians looked after me brilliantly. The
relief when the paramedics found the baby’s heart beat on the way was
indescribable. I was seen straight away by a obstetrician, then catheterized
(as I couldn’t walk anywhere) then wheeled in to see a neurologist and both
were able to confirm after thorough tests that the baby was fine and
that my spine was also OK, however they were still keen to X-ray and for me to
be seen by orthopedics as they possible suspected fractures to the hip and or
back. A motorcycle accident however prevented me from having X-rays at that
time and so I was taken to a small room in the maternity ward to spend the
night.
During that time I’d had the moral support of my Welsh touring
companion and good friend Dylan Fowler as well as Italian musician Stefano
Giacconne who was hosting and performing with us as well as the lovely Sonia
Ponzo a local photographer who had been on hand to document the gig. Stefano
and Sonia translating everything for me was very reassuring and Dylan had the
awful job of phoning Bill back in Cardiff to let him know what was happening.
The hospital staff brought me pain killers and told me that they
were keen for me to stay with them a further 3 or 4 days. Here was a dilemma. I
was due to fly back to Cardiff the following day with Dylan, who himself had to
be in Germany 2days after. Further complicated was that my poor husband Bill in
Cardiff is about to undergo major reconstruction surgery after and injury in
his right had and is unable to drive distances at present making travel
arrangements a little more tricky (though of course he was willing to do
everything in his power to get there ASAP!)
As I lay in my bed wondering what the best options were, relieved
that the baby was fine but in lots of pain. I decided that if in the morning the
Drs could again confirm that travelling wouldn't harm the baby and that any
injury to me was orthopaedic and not neurological then I would discharge myself
and get back to Cardiff and go straight to hospital there for the continued
treatment, as it would mean that I wouldn't be on my own in a foreign land (even
though everyone was so kind and good and supportive) , but in an English
speaking environment and most importantly with my husband as soon as I could
be. Decision made I reached for my iPod scrolled through the A’s and put on
Abigail Washburn’s City of Refuge album. It was just what I needed to hear! The
music transported me to another place that was beautiful uplifting and
comforting and welcome distraction indeed! As track 3 'Bring Me My Queen' began
to play the tears rolled down my face- it felt so affirming and spiritual, like
a prayer, calling to the deep parts of myself, to awaken and just bring me my
own queen and I'll be able to do what I need to do and find the strength to travel
and make it back home the next day… the morning came with the words of the
final track "Day Is A Breaking In My Soul' . As music is my job I am
a strong believer in the power that it has to connect and inspire and transcend
and heal, and the experience of those songs at that moment of crisis has been a
very real reminder to me of those qualities that the moments of a song can
bring.
Morning came, I managed to sit up in bed and eat the breakfast
brought in and was then wheeled for more checks. Dylan and Stefano arrived and
I told hem my thoughts re discharging myself. We didn’t have much time- the
journey from the hospital to the airport was 3 hours and we had to be there by
12.00 if we were going to make it in time for the flight. At this stage it hadn’t
occurred to me that I hadn’t actually walked since the ambulance had arrived after
the accident. I just knew I could move my legs and that my spine didn’t have
any neurological damage so assumed that meant I could walk. Wheeled in to see
the Obstetrician The Dr and staff confirmed again that the baby was fine, said
from their perspective that they would like me stay but understood my desire to
get back asap- gave me pain killers and I discharged myself. The moment of
truth. I tried to stand up to dress myself and found the pain shooting through
my legs and managed a tiny step feeling like the pain was going to make me
throw up. The kindly lady who was sharing the room with me offered help (she
was attached to a drip and looked very unwell herself!) I realized if I
couldn’t manage to get my jeans back on then how was I going to travel home and
suddenly I wondered if I could do it at all. My room mate called Dylan and
Stefano back into the room and I said something along the lines of this is
really bad, I’m not sure if I can do this… The clock was ticking to get to the
airport though and recalling the strength and peace I’d felt the night before
made the split decision to just do it. So sent Stefano for the car while Dylan
re packed my bag and then barely able to walk apart from a slow weak shuffle
held up by Dylan began the journey…
It was difficult. The baby kept on kicking which was very
re-assuring. We sorted wheelchairs for the airports either side made the 3 hour
drive from hospital to Milan, then the 3 hour drive from Gatwick to Cardiff (Easy-jet
had in the meantime left my bag behind- it was an inevitability really! But at
least it wasn’t my guitar which we took on board) Then in Cardiff I was met by
Bill and our good friend Becky who was being driver due to Bills hand injury and
went straight to our local hospital, where we spent the next 12 hours in the
hands of many other Drs and finally arrived home on Tuesday. (Verdict being
severe muscle spasms in legs and a likely small fracture in hip but they decided
against X-rays as they would be harmful to the baby)
In those 48 hours between the fall at 5pm on Sunday eve and getting
home at 9am Tuesday morning I had amassed the grand total of 1 hours sleep!!
It was quite an experience… I am sincerely thankful for the selfless
support and kindness of all the lovely Italian hospital staff and musicians,
the beautiful Sonia Ponzo, the fantastic Stefano Giaccone and my rock solid and
brilliant friend Dylan Fowler.
10
days later….
It has been such a relief to be home with
Bill! The baby continues to be well however I’ve had a few more complications as
am now in the care of the Maternity physiotherapy unit at the hospital who have
identified further problems with my hip. So many lovely folks have been in
touch asking for updates and offering support so below is the copy of my latest
email update about it all…
Bill and I are
both well in spirit but rather rubbish in body at the moment!! (Though the baby
is fine and well)
I've just returned
from the physio and have a whole new paradigm to get my head round. My general
mobility has improved from being unable to walk to hobbling on crutches and the
bruising and swelling are progressing as they should while most muscle spasms have
eased however there are further complications that the physio has identified
that need to be addressed...
The fall in Italy
has resulted in my left hip being out of line and higher than the right one.
Muscle tightness and inflammation are pushing it up- so I begin hydro-therapy
for general muscle work to try and loosen it every wednesday from now on in the
pool at the Heath Hospital- I won't start my actual physio treatment until I am
a little more mobile as it will get worse before it gets better etc…
Because of
pregnancy and the fact that the area most effected by the fall is my pelvic
area, I will now be unable to do things like push a shopping trolley, lift,
hoover or mop, drive, walk the dog etc… until 2 months after having given birth
(they treat it like if you've had a caesarian) Though I may be able to drive
sooner but will need ok from dr in order to be covered by any insurance…
This all further
complicated by the fact that Bill is due for his hand surgery on the 30th May
and will also be unable to lift/ walk dog/ drive/ etc…
In the light of this we have decided that its
best to cancel and postpone upcoming gig on 26th May/ as well as recording my
EP from the 3-7 June and my new Counting The Waves show for its premier date
July 6th… The physio
seemed to think that the overall physicality of performing would be too much
and we would hate to create setbacks that hinder recovery and health for giving
birth...
There are also a
lot of unknowns- as we don't know the impact that the baby will have on my now
weakened pelvis/ back and hips as she grows, which may hinder my recovery- … we
also don't know how Bill will respond to surgery- the healing and
rehabilitation for him is very dependent on how his body responds to the metal
wiring and pins and whether it rejects it or not…
I am currently
looking in to getting cleaners and dog walkers and friends on board to help us
manage these next weeks… and lots of folks have been very kind in offering
etc.. which is great ( I guess we have the pathetic sympathy vote- crippled
husband with his pregnant wife of crutches!!)
Huge thanks for
all your messages of support and concern
Freelance
Survival as a Musician: Notes and Thoughts based on Panel session at Cult Cymru
Creative Industries Fair March 2012
My thoughts and notes compiled here… (warning
another very long post!)
The
Thin Line
Wire-Walker, Phillipe Petit broke into the
twin towers and set up a wire between them, for him to walk on… (see Man On Wire documentary film or read his book,'To Reach the Clouds' for
more info)…
This required: vision, risk, self belief,
training, strategic planning, skill, focus, single-mindedness, long hours,
years of work, sense of a bigger picture, out sourcing team members, networking,
luck and overcoming of many obstacles…
The image of the wire-walker stepping out onto
this thin line without guarantees other than personal belief, skill and vision you will
get to the other side, resonates with my own journey as a freelancer… it was the lack of safety nets that first made me think of this. No sick pay, no pension scheme, no holiday, etc... and thats just for starters. No guarantees of any revenue or return for the hours that you put in. Yet in order to go free-lance you have to take that first step onto the rope take the risk that you'll be able to keep on walking... one step at a time...
The actual tightrope to me represents something both positive and negative... The negative is the obvious, its a mighty thin line that you walk on and to stay focussed and balanced against the elements, wind, rain, heat, noise, distractions and external pressures etc... takes an awful lot of practice, skill and single-mindedness... However to me that need for practice, skill and single-mindedness is also the positive as it is this that enables you to journey in a way that others don't dare to tread, there is a liberation and freedom in the act of each step defying fear and choosing the line and the direction you want to move forward in...
All sounds a bit extreme, but in so many ways being freelance is. There are no guarantees that the work will come as and when you need it to. As an artist in the freelance world you stick at it because for you personally all other options and choices are more of a death sentence than the choice not to try! To be actively pursuing your art as a vocation is both a passion and the only way you can stay true to yourself, well this is how it is for me at any rate... .
One
The Wire: The Balancing Act : Artist versus Business versus Life
Being Freelance in the arts requires sometimes seemly opposed mindsets.
On the one hand you need to create, and
develop your art and in order to do this you must maintain a focused and
professional approach to your artistic discipline. You need time to create,
experiment, practice, challenge yourself…
You need to be good and keep on getting
better at what you do in order for you to build a reputation and get work in
the first place…
But you also need an understanding of some
basic business and management principles in order to create and maintain viable
employment opportunities.
This is a continual balancing act with time
and energy as both pursuits are potentially full time endeavours!
Management of time, finance, administration
and artistic vision can seem over whelming and often at odds with each other.
Identify weak areas and put in place
strategies to over come these.
Seek advice.
Be prepared to change.
Be prepared to work very hard.
Decide how you measure success and what
your own value systems are…
ie; will you consider yourself successful
if your work means your have no time to maintain healthy relationships with
your friends and loved ones? What are your limits? (These may well change over
time)
Be prepared to examine and re- examine how
best to approach each stage and
Know that you are able to be flexible and
where you want to draw the line. As much as you can, try and anticipate the
cost and consequences of your life style choices. There are no right ways to
any of this. It is entirely up to you how you find that balance and what works
best. Be prepared to diversify if necessary and be flexible while maintaining a
sense of vision…. Keep taking risks, in the full understanding that there are
no guarantees of anything working the way you wanted… but try anyway, as they
just might work out even better!
Different
Stages Of The Journey…
Stage
1, Building from scratch, say yes to everything!
Start with your own vision and goals but be
prepared to saying yes to everything! You need to gain experience, build a
reputation, create networks and business relationships and get what ever you
can that pays at this stage! This often means diversifying what you do as well
as doing favours/mates rates/ loss leaders. Expect lots of hard work for little
reward, and keep focused! It can also be fun and exciting stepping out and
taking risks and finding your feet as you go…
Sometimes it’s helpful to hold down a part
time job along side the freelance work, especially if you have bills to pay…
Stage
2 Developing: upping your game
Use the reputation that you are building to
your advantage…
Set more realistic boundaries, Learn to say
no.
Become more focused on what you do and stop
doing too many things for free.
Begin to out source a little more, decide a
pay scale that you will ask (even if its just expenses covered plus donation)
You need to begin to up your own expectations and this also helps folks take
you more seriously…
Keep on creating the opportunities/ events
you want…
Look at branding/re branding
Web presence/
Join PRS. MCPS.
Stage
3, Fine Tuning
You still need to generate and keep
developing your material, but at this stage you notice that more invitations
begin to come your way…
You can become a little more choosey in
what you say yes to and have more creative and artistic overall control over
what you do.
This doesn’t necessarily mean your work
load is less, often when the game is upped there is a lot more at stake and
success often brings new obstacles and pressures with it.
Continue to be strategic this could mean a
higher investment… re pr, look at new league of PR out sourcing while
maintaining the relationships you already have with venues, promoters,
journalists… keeping an eye on new gate keepers, changing industry, maintain
established data base, networks and web presence…
Continue to create the opportunities /
events /products you want to make…
Success in one area does not always equal
more work, there may be times when the external situations ie: venue closure or
key person who has been championing you changes job or change in current trends,
recession etc… can all hit and cause havoc! Learning to keep on adapting and
rolling with the punches as they come is an on going lifelong process…
And sometimes its just all a matter of being that right person in the right place at the right time!
Ongoing
Survival Tactics (in no particular order of relevance!)
Health
and Stress Management
Financial insecurity, long hours, being
your own boss, continually generating new work and creative products etc… can
be incredibly stressful. Stress leads to bad health and that in turn creates
more stress as if you don’t work you don’t get paid etc… it can all end up
being one overwhelming vicious circle… Stress also drains you so that you have
no energy left to be creative…
Finding ways to relax, and as much as
possible keep on top of health can be an essential part of surviving as a
freelancer, as well as an Artist. It doesn't need to be anything more than just going out for a walk- but its making sure you do that! As a friend has just reminded me- I walk the dog, essential down time away from everything and also forcing me to exercise and get out in the fresh air!
Working for yourself can also be a lonely
experience, especially if you are an extrovert who needs to process ideas with
other people. If this is the case gather a few folk around you that you can
meet up with to chat things through and bounce ideas off, you can make this a
formal or informal occasion… This will force you to think outside of your own
perspective and may help to clarify goals or just get stuff off your chest! If you are an introvert the challenge may be actually building in down time stopping work and allowing yourself to reconnect back into everyday... this can be difficult as a creative zone is a hard place to leave once you've entered... Also making time for solitude after a heavy week of networking, admin etc... may well be essential to restore creative and personal energy for both extravert or introvert types...
Put down times/ holiday/ days or at least hours off into the diary and then as far as is possible stick to them! keep the work phone/ emails off during these times!!
Networking,
researching, knowing where and who the ‘Gate keepers’ are…
Understand the nature of the industry and
begin to choose how you play.
Learn how to network effectively, ask
questions, be interested in the people you want to meet, don’t just pitch and
talk about your self.
Data base, emails, names and follow up on
any contacts you felt there was a connection with directly…
Maintain healthy relationships with those
you network with, this is a key part of survival as you need folks to recommend
you or think of you when a potential job offer comes your way
Find
Ways of dealing with Criticism… (Essential for
survival for the rest creative life) How to keep going after bad reviews?!…
When to take on board criticism- don’t
invite it when you are too raw straight after a show/ gig… if possible choose a
time when you have a bit of distance and clear head. Learn to differentiate
between negative blanket statement pointless feedback and constructive
criticism. Choose to take constructive criticism on board and work with it ultimately
it will only improve your art…
Effective Marketing...
Flyers Posters/Viral Marketing/Email data-base/ Social Networking Sites
PR, and press releases (employ someone or
learn how to write one)
Radio/ Listings/ Adverts/ Magazine/ Papers
Promo videos/ trailers/ demos
Gimmicks/ Give Away /Publicity stunts
Accessing and utilizing other networks
Be strategic, know the difference between
spamming and being effective
Keep
on honing your craft... getting better at it and
challenging yourself…
Open mics (are often pretty soul
destroying, but can be good places to try out new material and get time in
front of an audience) Writers circles, safe places to look at the craft of what
you’re doing. Jam session with other musicians… etc… Filming/ recording live performances can be a great way to critic your own performance when you watch back and see what works and what needs to be worked on! Just putting in the practice and continually setting aside time to work on new material can help also...
Overcoming
obstacles...
Anticipate potential problems, at this
stage you’ve probably had your fair share already of nightmare gigs and dodgy
promoters etc… bring spare technical equipment with you. Turn up to venue in
plenty of time. Know what you want in technical terms for your sound and email
promoter, engineer in advance.
Contracts… written confirmation of all
details discussed with venue or promoter
colleague, outsourcing agent…
Sometimes you do everything in your power
to make things work and something out of your control will sabotage it. You
might have everything in place to do a great show, reviewers and guests are
invited and your sound engineer turns up to the venue, drunk or stoned, gives
you a rubbish mix on and off stage… Gutting… Try and make the very best of it
that you can and pull out a professional and slick performance regardless- you
come off looking professional and ultimately any discerning audience will say
great show- pity about the sound, knowing the difference that lies there in…
Create
the opportunities/ product you want...
Hire a venue and put on as close to an
ideal version of how you would like your art to be seen as you can manage.
Film/ record/ photograph the event,
Be in control of as much of the environment
as you can.
Set the bar high, but work within realistic
budgets, a small space packed with 30 people creates far more buzz and energy
than an empty hall with 30 people!
Book a studio and record, hire top quality
producers, session musicians to work with you, (get an extra job to pay for it
if needs be!)
Buy a good microphone and invest in technology
to record your own product…
If you have a fan base, utilising their support can also be a good way to go about this, check out the Pledge http://www.pledgemusic.com/ website or Kickstarter http://www.kickstarter.com/ for more info on how to go about this...
Continually
Seek Help and Inspiration...
Keep filling the well to try and prevent your creative self and ideas from drying up. Go and see stuff live, keep
researching listening to, seeking out new material. Read blogs, watch TED talks…don’t
get stuck in a rut… Be inspired by other artists and creative folk around you,
this can be like a flint keeping you edgy and sharp…
Make use the your union, for advice /
training etc its what its there for...
Don’t be afraid to ask advice from folks
who you perceive as further down the road that you want to be…
Reading: entrepreneurs/ creative thinkers
Often providing insights and principles
that can be transferred to both business and creative practice…
Below re a list of various folks whose
ideas I’ve found helpful
